Some Special Words


All about the white gal: Berlin (2019)

pretty white gal (ahl)
with some sprinkles o(a)n (ahn)

c’est bizarre, oh là là, cette femme est un originale!

gorgeous walk! there she talks!

blablabla, oh là là

Salut! Coucou! Oh là là

oui oui comme ça, and


Dresden 2016

I take you aside,
to see what you do:
sometime’s you’re talking back to me,
but truly: I don’t say that much to you.

so here we are:

let’s face some time of sparing.
(hearing nothing much but staring)

”So, how’ve you been?” – you try (again), but,

my head’s an empty space,
my face a single stare,
my hands not warm enough to hold,
to keep,
sweet silence, one friend deserves to bare.

Gimme Rice and Chicken Sauce: Kalbe (2017)


I’m this empty whomb,

waiting for my body to bleed.
Month by Month –
Painkillers will do.

Till one Baby creeps
(over nine months no bloody rainz).

But for now my hair falls down the windowsill,
I feel my ovaries like wishingwells
hanging onto each others crutch.


August was a Freak: Lausanne (2017)

”Look @him” 1 Apple cries –
Now our story can begin Just Fine

his dress is blue and diamondbright,
and fleshy colour laces up his
pure pure pinkish foolish-ness,

Just Fine

He sees those Apples cry out loud: Apples up and Apples down

Apperel-ent-ly, he took his gun
is there some mind to tell us not?
His age as old as fathers is and

I don’t mind to be his grl,
I don’t wanna hurt nobody.

”But will you
But will you show us
But will you show us the way to keep control?”


so he put out the gun and it’s all laced up in black
and now we smile for real and all those Apples cry
”It’s 3&1, my days are numbered”

.    To be just fair: I like his dress, I wear the same


Today we sit and have some tea (T), we keep our lacey gun close next to us (I feel my heart is trusting his)

so we switched our fingers: I kept his smile,
he took my left brown eye and
Thirty-one, his days are numbered.

I bought more lace to feel the sun burning way too hot. I’m sweating, choking, swalling hard, feel my flesh unwearable

then: Apples up and Apples down

”But will you
But will you show us
But will you show us the way to keep control?


his phone rings mine,

he tells me now, to tell you applepies:

31, your days R numbered

Bochum 2015

sweet pussy presses baby: this breed glides out so neat.
Her pussy’s sweetest baby is pressed out thick and neat.
Her mother glances freaky: Hot water, pulvered milk.
Her newborn, pressed-out-baby: Her pussys’s tiny seed.

My hair burned out so quickly. Those lungs are dark, grey fields. I fall asleep as quicly, as tiny pussys’s breed.

Tempted Red: New York (2015)

The ring you missed- I gave to her.
You asked, I lied.
I’m sorry.

Could we go back to that, please?

She was. I was. She said. I loved.
You see? She was. I was. I loved.

You never asked, you never knew.
I’m sorry.

May I go back to that, please?

She gave me back that ring. I cried.
You know, I know, you saw.
You asked, I lied.
I’m sorry.

I’m not ready, please.

I gave her back that damn red thing!
You never knew, you never saw, you always missed.
I’m sorry.

Princess, Princess: Dresden (2016)

she’s some princess in my eyes: sparkling bubbles cross my mind. „will you please come over here and stay?“
sometimes hours cross my head and sing me songs: they sticky stuck my eyelids. so powerful.
when I cry it’s sugarcubes. So much: And then I open up and see you’re still not coming up to me.

I lie down. Next to me some book,
reading, blushing, smelling nice.

same sort book lies next to me. smelling differently.
however, sometimes, turning away. Just lying down. , time’s just passing.

Falling heavier, like sugardrops down melting: It’s not hot in here but dusty.

I track my rusty back and see: you’re still not coming up to me.

, I was a little kid,
,I really, really knew,
, that time, will change us closely.

And then some 23, and maybe 34, or older- here we go:
still these little kids with sugarcubes like candy crush opening those shoulders, like wings hanging down.
little feathers.

just tiny ones.
, at least.
The skin got rustier. turning backs, so painful…
„Ah“ , I say.

Hey and Ah.
Hey Princess Ah Princess.
, Ah.

sticky stuck. stuck sticky.
, „Hey Princess.“

,I turn around (again) and see. You’re still not coming up to me.

Two Cherries: Dresden/Brighton (2015)

We’re like wizened raisins fefted by:
hanging sweet and heavy-
hanging sweet and lonely-
watching one each other:

hanging sweet and dry.

“What did you say?”

This voice seemed vast and quiet.

Just water could have helped me from being sweet and dry:

slowly: liquid touches my nostrils: random bits of glitter start dancing in the sun.

äh, sticky bits behind her?
-oh. syrup runs outside her.
, sweet and heavy:

dropps towards the sky


..this voice seemed sick and funny.

Just water could have helped me from being sweet and dry.

Poem5: Brighton (2014)

When I was drunk, I took those flowers: (I had respect- but then I drank). I ripped them out from neighbour’s garden- I had a laugh and fell asleep.
When I was drunk I took her kisses: (I had respect- but then I drank). I hicked up stupidely and kissed gross othes… and had a laugh and fell asleep.
When I was drunk I slapped some faces: (I had respect- but then I drank)… this happaned blatantly and out of context- and had a laugh and fell asleep.
The other morning- I saw dead blossoms, had bodypain and swollen lips. I asked myself: “Why did this happen?”, I had a drink and fell asleep.

Children's Lullaby: Brighton (2014)

When I. I-I-I.
When I had. When I had my. My-My-My. Oh-My, first kiss.
I was 9 years old.
After playing with toys- she told me the kiss has to last 5 min.
We stopped the time.
The other she. She-She.
Mentioned Sex to me.
I was even younger.
She wrote S-E-X in bright letters on barbie’s blackboard.
It’s forbidden. That’s what she said after erasing those letters.

I-I-was. I-I. Was 13 when he first kissed me.
He was 23. He said “Love has no boundaries. We are going to make it”.
I hang up the phone.

17. I can’t remember. He called me bitch, my friends the police.

My first amourrrrr
broke my heart and left.

I wish, No. I want. No.
I better stop.